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Bedside Spider Strikes Again!
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| | Bedside Spider by Olly Omani
Sources again report in the early hours of December 4th, 2017 a 63 year-old man named Blake Robertson was struck by the Spider. As with previous victims, the Spider is reported as tall, thin and dressed in dark clothing. "He drugged me, I don't know how, but he drugged me." Robertson said as part of our interview, "There's no other way he could have tied me to the bed without waking me. I'm up at least three or four times a night - enlarged prostate, and I'm a light sleeper besides." There was no evidence of any common sedatives found in Mr. Robertson's toxicology despite his claims, though other victims have reported a similar disbelief that they wouldn't have awoken. "He never said nothing. He just stood there. I couldn't see his eyes, he had some mask or something on, but I could feel him staring at me." Robertson went on, later in the interview, "Hours it went on. I prayed to the Lord for help, but it never came, not until later that afternoon."
A neighbor noticed Mr. Robertson's newspaper hadn't been taken in and, fearing the worst, went in to check and found the gentleman tied, hand and foot to his bed with a gag in his mouth. This makes the fourth victim, all with similar
experiences.
So far, the police aren't ramping up the investigation, citing a lack of any robbery or long term harm to the victim and more violent crimes and drug trade as reasons for the low amount of attention. But people in lower Manhattan are worried. Worried that they'll wake up from their peaceful sleep to be greeted by the looming figure of this clearly mentally unstable individual.
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| ...Of The Week
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Offensive Joke of the Week: What do you get when you cross goat DNA and human DNA? Kicked out of the petting zoo.
Punny Joke of the Week: I used to be addicted to the Hokey Pokey, but I turned myself around.
Quote of the Week: "All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream." - Edgar Allan Poe
Riddle of the Week: What has one eye but cannot see?
Last Week's Answer: A secret.
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| Obituaries
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Rachel Henricks, age 29, was found mauled by an animal, local law enforcement seems to believe it was a large, possibly starving dog. She leaves behind her two young children and husband. She was a nurse and known in the community as bubbly and friendly to everyone.
Omar Smith, age 24, was found dead in his sleep in his apartment by his girlfriend. The cause of death is unknown.
Drugs and alcohol do not appear to have been involved, but due to Mr. Smith's religious beliefs, his body was not able to be autopsied. He leaves behind his parents and older brother. He had been on the path to becoming a dentist before dying so tragically.
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Click Here to Submit a Question Ask Olly Donate To Keep The Lantern Lit
| | I am not a certified therapist, psychiatrist or anything else, but if you have a question and want some unbiased, objective advice from a guy who doesn't know you, you've come to the right place!
''Dear Olly, I love my husband but his father is a Trump supporter and very vocal about it. It's gotten to the point where I don't want to go to any of his family visits. My husband is floating out the idea of having his parents stay at our house for the holidays and I'm not sure how to cope.
Sincerely, Trump Fatigued''
Thanks for writing in Trump Fatigued. You'd be surprised how often some variation of this question has come up for me recently. It used to be politics and religion were potentially explosive subjects with family, now it's definitely nuclear.
I think honesty and compromise are the best policy here. Tell your husband how you feel and try not to make any judgements about his father, just about how being around him makes you feel. Unfortunately for you, you do have his father in your life and if you're trying to change his mind about his politics, you're probably wasting your time and asking for an argument. Maybe you can visit his parents but stay at a hotel, or have his parents stay at one. Maybe your husband can talk his dad down and make politics a topic that's off-limits.
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