Courier
| RUBY LOUNGE: ROARING TWENTIES PARTY |
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Amber Morgan
________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________ Meanwhile, in classic wallflower style, I took my job propping up the wall quite seriously. Ms January Stevens ensured that I was not lacking for conversations and soon newcomer to Haven's eligible bachelor scene, Barclay Jones soon joined her in keeping me company. Very pleasing to the eyes in his hipster glasses and silk tie, he provided me with interesting conversation- at least until Salem Arkwright swooped in, declaring him a perfect husband for the birthday girl. The pair- Barclay and Alivia, took to the dance floor, and showed off their moves. All in all, this not-so-party-girl thoroughly enjoyed her night out and gives full credit to those that arranged the event. Can't wait for the next event hosted by the fab Ruby Lounge. |
| INFORMATION SOUGHT AFTER MUTILATED CAT FOUND |
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Amber Morgan
A local checkout lady who didn't want to be identified who saw the remains is worried, "Who would do something like that? Poor kitty. I don't think I'll be letting my cat out at night for a bit." Her friend agreed, "First its cats, but you know. Studies show that that is just where they start. Next thing it'll be some body getting beaten up on, you mark my words!" The cat is identified as a brownish, off-black domestic shorthair, approximately a year old and not spayed or declawed. Police believe the animal to be a stray, however if anyone is missing an animal of that description are encouraged to contact the local Haven Sheriff's Department. |
| LOCAL MOTORCYCLIST DEAD |
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Amber Morgan
The driver of the motorcycle was pronounced dead at the scene and was identified as Kieran MacNamara. The authorities said that the weather was clear the morning of the accident and none of the fog that had been plaguing the city over the last few months was present. |
| Foggy Weather Claims Two Lives |
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Amber Morgan
The accident occurred at the intersection of Mariner's Highway and Paine Avenue late Tuesday night. A spokeman for the Emergency Service (Rescue-1050) said that two people died on the spot while a woman was shifted to Massachusetts General Hospital, where her condition was reported to be critical. Leading Senior Highway Patrol Officer Dick Snakeshaft released the following safety information how to drive safely in the fog: 1. Be Aware of Local Weather Conditions. Fog is often a morning or evening weather phenomena, so if possible, avoid driving during these times. 2. Allow More Distance Between Vehicles. Increase your count distance by 5 seconds instead of the normal 2 seconds behind another vehicle. 3. Use caution at all times. The moisture in the air may continuously collect on the windshield, making it more difficult to see. 4. Make use of fog lights. Many more safer models of cars have fog lights or driving lights equipped. 5. Don't Drift. There's a natural tendency to wander into the middle of the road when visibility gets bad. Be sure to keep yourself in your lane. 6. Beware of Critters. Animals--especially white tail deer--feel bolder under cover of fog and are much harder to see. 7. Beware of Freezing Fog. In some climates, fog near the freezing point can freeze on contact with cold surfaces--including roads! This can cause black ice. 8. Pull over to the side of the road if you have no visibility. If it gets too difficult or thick, pull over and wait. |
| Local Woman Abducted by Expert Makeup Artist |
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Amber Morgan
Although the accused is described as having light blue eyes, of athletic build with short blonde hair, it is suspected that he is someone with extensive skill in theatrical and stage makeup, and able to change his look to appear similar to others and it is advised that people be extra alert and vigilant when they see people they know acting out of character. Anyone with information on this or any other similar incidents are advised to contact the Haven Sheriff's Department. |
| Deformed Calf has 8 Legs, 4 Ears, 2 Bodies and 1 Head |
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Amber Morgan
Phil Herbit, a local Haven farmer who delivered the stillborn calf and thought the animal was 'pretty unusual' and thought if him and his wife had not of been there, the mother cow would probably of died too. "It was hard going," Phil told Haven Courier. "I was up to my elbows in lube and calf goo, sweat coming off my forehead. It's not nice to see a cow hurting like that; the heifer kicked my wife right in the shin and she howled more than the cattle!" [ Following is a picture of the deformed stillborn calf on a concrete floor: http://goo.gl/noed6L] |
| LOCAL CHARITY BULLIES RESIDENTS |
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Amber Morgan
Usurping the role of the Haven Sheriff department, they have recently started taking to beating citizens who do not submit to their 'authority' and even stealing their clothes. Hugh Jorgin 34, a local deer hunter commented. "Huntin' in these parts is pretty good. An yup, sometimes when ya get a deer you get a bit of blood on ya. Ain' nothing a bit of soap won' fix. But shit, betta than runnin' bout naked. Wha' gives them the right to be stealin' shit and beaten up decent normal folks?" Concerned locals are calling for the Sheriff to take action. |
| Town Flooded but Haven Locals not Phased! |
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Amber Morgan
Wayne Kerr (33) commented from his spot eating curly fries at the Lodge. "I've been eatin' me breaky 'ere at the L??odge for tha' las' twenty years. I ain' lettin' jus' a lil' ol rain stop me from gettin' me grub an' gettin' laid." "I knooooow right?", Anita Naylor (19) pipes in from next to Wayne Kerr. Dressed in a designer outfit with not a smidgen of mud on it, you've got to only admire the ability of the locals to persevere and be resourceful in time of hardship. "There was this family next door with like a dozen kids stuck in the bathroom or somethin' and yet a young man was sweet on me enough to see all two hundred and eighteen of my dresses to safety." Anita Naylor gives me a knowing look and a coy wink. "He was well rewarded for his efforts if you get what I mean. Carried me all the way to the Lodge he did, jus' so me heels didna get dirty." Meanwhile, on the other side of town at Haven's Hospital, a team of medical professionals and volunteers worked relentlessly all day and night to provide medical support to those that needed it with several people still in a critical condition. Thankfully despite the seriousness of the disaster, there have been no lives reported lost. Many of Haven High school teenagers have been at the forefront of philanthropic work, collecting donations and distributing to those that need it with Honey Forester leading the efforts.? For those interested in donating to the cause, a bank account has been set up and details posted on the website. |
| RUBY LOUNGE NORTH GRAND OPENING REVIEW |
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Amber Morgan
This setup also allowed for a very diverse age range of attendees to this special occasion, ranging from the too fashionable hipsters in their early twenties whose fashion can be as confusing as their lingo, to that odd older gentleman who is in his sixties and courting your aunty or mum's best friend. Although that probably reads as being detrimental, it is the very opposite and I can only admire and commend Ruby Club North for their efforts, this is a fine establishment which in my opinion boosts Haven's nightlife beautifully. The anticipation for the headliner Requiem of Angels was beyond indisputable, quite suiting considering it was now nearly impossible to see the musicians with near full house present. Kylie Jackson was outstanding in her delivery, with a symphonic feel on songs like Shatter' Me to the While Your Lips Are Still Red and her stunning soulful voice, she had enthralled the many in attendance, but also provided a beautiful soundtrack for this event. Upon exiting, I could barely wipe the smile away as this occasion had been one of the more special outings I have had in quite sometime. Without hesitation I will be returning to Ruby Lounge North and I highly recommend you doing the same. ------------------------------------------------------------ RUBY LOUNGE NORTH OWNER & HAVEN'S MOST ELIGBLE BATCHELOR: Cael Harwood, 31. THE SKINNY: Born in Manchester, New Hampshire to a doctor and nurse he grew up to attend Harvard Law. More recently he arrived in Haven to open a new branch of the firm he started with a friend in New York. LIKES: Bespoke shirts and watches House of Cards NATURAL HABITAT: Upmarket venues with extravagant decor. CAVEAT: Despite his reputation for being devilishly handsome- Harwood is a married-to-his-job type, he's known to work 20-hour days - and seems committed to doing so, at least for the next few years. |
| Ruby Lounge North Opening Shots! |
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Amber Morgan
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| Potrait of a Killer |
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Amber Morgan
He is probably a white male, young and a loner. He would have a history of being cruel to animals, likely was bullied and humiliated as a child by both family and by other children. As well, he was prone to bed wetting up into his mid-teens or even early adulthood. He has likely never had a real relationship with a woman, and is forced into solo sexual activities through aggressive masturbation techniques. It has been reported AVR's penis is scarred, small and malformed, likely as a result. Because of his own feelings of sexual inadequacy, he tends to pick on vulnerable women and men, and half the time he knows his victims. (.... The article goes on to describe in detail the common similarities on serial killers and rapists, pulling information from various credible sources.) BREAKING NEWS: We have been informed by Detective Dick Snakeshaft that the AVR has been injured. And while still on the loose, the injuries have been serious enough that he would no longer possess the same risk as he had. It is still advised that people take extra measures to secure their safety till he can be caught. |
| April Missed Connections |
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Amber Morgan
April 18th - That girl with all the veins in her neck - m4w - 28 April 23rd - Saw you at the Thrift Store - m4m - 48 April 23rd - To the guy that stole my towel at the YMCA - m4m - 23 April 23rd - You saved my life - w4m - 18 |
| HAVEN'S AVR HAS STRUCK AGAIN |
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Amber Morgan
This very dangerous man is still on the loose and the local Neighborhood watch has issued the following recommendations to limit your risk: + Get to know your neighbors. Exchange telephone numbers and keep an eye on each other. + Keep doors and windows locked all areas of your home when occupied and secure the house when you leave. + During evening hours, and when the mists make visibility difficult, always walk with a friend and keep your mobile handy. + Let friends and neighbors know where you are going and times to expect you. + If you do need to leave the house alone, even during the day try to keep a friend on the phone while walking. And remember, if you see anything suspicious, please report it to the Haven Police Department: 911. |
| BREAKING NEWS: INSANE KILLER IS ON THE LOOSE IN HAVEN |
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Amber Morgan
She has been identified as a local girl by the name of Rani Featherstone and close relatives have been contacted. In a statement, the victim's family said: "Words cannot describe the pain we feel not having her here. Rani was not just a beautiful girl to look at, she was a beautiful girl inside; so kind and helpful, she was adored by everyone. As a family, we are absolutely devastated and still cannot believe this has happened." The decapitated head of the six year old Rani was delivered to the Haven Courier's office inside of a backpack with a DVD of the incident at 7am on the 21st of April, just a few hours after she had been reported missing. Local residents are reminded to be extra vigilant, lock doors and take precautions when outside, particularly in the hours of darkness. [A smiling photograph of a pretty young girl all dressed up for her first day of school. Her glossy black hair has been drawn up in into a ribboned ponytail and she wears a DORA backpack.] |
| BREAKING NEWS Filmaker Killed in Fatal Crash |
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Amber Morgan
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| REVIEW: The Chop House |
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Amber Morgan
It's hardly surprising, given this restaurant's considerable pedigree. The Chop House is the second venture by head chef Henry Moore, the charming man behind one of Boston's most beloved Restaurants, The Big Guy. The team behind the Chop House have quickly established a small restaurant offering tremendous appeal to locals. The Chop House offers the same laid-back atmosphere, attractive prices and uncompromising quality that made its predecessor in Boston such a lovable institution, but builds a certain finesse into its feel that seems a lot more refined and classical. The menu, crafted by Henry Moore himself, encompasses a seasonal and very reasonably priced selection of fine dining and creative cocktail options. There's also a prime cut of beef sirloin on offer every night for only $22, leaving you with very few excuses, financial or otherwise, to not visit the Chop House. From their thoughtful menu selection to their polished dessert list, food at the Chop House are everything you would expect. Mains like the braised rack of lamb, which is a refreshing fusion of ricotta gnudi, wilted spinach and a tasty red wine jus; are both reasonably priced and a perfect accompaniment to the impending Spring. My personal favorite though? The French Cheesecake. Light, airy and mousse-like in texture, it melts in your mouth with its sweet creamy softness. The raspberry sauce sets it off perfectly, making it one of the best I've enjoyed. [A picture showcasing a beautifully presented, and mouthwatering slice of french cheesecake, drizzled with a raspberry sauce.] |
| FEATURED STORE: Steam Princess' Crystal Works |
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Amber Morgan
Her eye catching sculpture of a bonsai cherry blossom tree symbolizes friendship, the renewal of spring and the ephemeral nature of life and is the perfect housewarming gift. Perched on a rich brown tray, the petals sparkle brilliantly in soft pink and white. For the cultured hipster, she also has a range of very on-trend glass mason jars which sparkle with green fairy lights, perfect for the coming barbecue season! Her white gold chandelier necklace makes the perfect gift for that special someone in your life. Don't wait for a birthday or valentines day, surprise her with this exquisite piece that is sure to leave any woman breathless! It is easy to get lost and spend hours in such a beautiful setting, and already spoiled for choice, Gwyn also offers personalized requests and can be reached on 777-6655. |
| Enlighten your taste buds at Mamma Mia Pizza shop |
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Amber Morgan
The simple room with its open kitchen, brick oven, and painted Italian painted rustic tables, holds a cozy family atmosphere and tantalizes with the aromas of fresh oven baked pizzas. The restaurant fills at lunch time with students from the nearby Haven High School and in the evening with families out for dinner. The place is unpretentious, noisy and good value. My favorite was the ultimate supreme: served with a tart tomato sauce and scattered with spicy sausage, this one is one of their best sellers. Mamma Mia is meticulous with its pizza sauces, often articulating the ingredients so that you can see the flavors as well as enjoy them. All the serves, lived up to Mamma Mia's idea of generosity, being large and filling to the point of being a challenge to get through.
-------------------- Norma Stits: "I'll make it short: One of the best Pizza places that I have ever eaten in!" Liz Bien: "This place is the bomb. The Pizzas are fab. The atmosphere warm and inviting. But best of all ... The service was brilliant. They took us in, on a busy night without a booking ... plied us with delicious reds ... Made us feel like part of the family. Thanks guys!" Edvard Gaviston: "They're f**king delicious, that's what they are." |
| Officials Finally Find the Root of Power Disruption |
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Amber Morgan
An investigation was launched, and data was analysed over three months from December 2013 to February 2014 the two electrical distribution companies operating in the area provided data on more than two hundred instances when power went out for a reason other than a major event. The filings, detailing disruptions that lasted more than five minutes, showed a total of five hundred and twenty three customers were affected. The reports showed that the grid had several weakened areas in need of an upgrade, and in particular, the more recent outages were the result of a tree root growing around an electricity cable, rupturing the insulation. A specialist arborist, Neil Enlick, was called in to take care of the large three hundred year old oak tree on the Kent's family front yard but was met with resistance from the retired couple that lives there. "That tree has been a part of our family going back five generations. I'm not letting anyone chop it down! They'll have to go through me and Jack first!" Mrs Kent said from her spot tied by her pantyhose to the trunk. Temple Private Securities, were keen to offer a solution to the Kent family that did not involve the uprooting of their precious oak. Commander Rhodes commented, "We care about the community, and this tree has been a part of it for generations. We're happy to have our specialists come in and see to the situation." Mrs Kent was so pleased, she gave Commander Rhodes one of her award winning carrot cakes, topped with cream cheese icing. "Guess you lot ain' so bad after all." She said. |
| BREAKING NEWS: A man has died and two others seriously injured after a horror smash in Boston |
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Amber Morgan
"It's in the early stage of the investigation but at this stage, we believe the only factors involved in this accident were speed and poor driving conditions," Detective Dick Snakeshaft said. "Our thoughts are with Timothy's friends, family and work mates at Temple Private Security. We hope this is a grave reminder to those on our roads to drive to the conditions. Speeding kills." [The short news piece is accompanied by Timothy's grinning face as he tugs up his shirt to expose particularly well toned abdominal muscles] |
| BREAKING NEWS: A Man found dead in Central Haven |
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Amber Morgan
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| AN ODE TO ODDNESS |
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Amber Morgan
How obsessions, differences, and even frailties can be our defining traits and our best-loved. How things that might first have brought shame or sadness can turn into badges of honor. There are people that are generic. They give generic responses and they want generic answers. They live inside their generic boxes and they think anyone who doesn't fit in is weird. Some, even take it that step further and try to get them to change, even take their weirdness away. They are like genetically modified plants growing in a clinical lab, like facsimile faces, like droids. Like ignorance. Instead, to quote the words of a great man: "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." Don't follow and get lost while trying to fit in the crowd. Extraordinary people rarely fit in. Express yourself, express your life and express the moment. Live your life and remember these things are made so much sweeter when we can have a good chuckle at ourselves. |
| SUICIDE RATES IN HAVEN, HIGHEST IN STATE |
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Amber Morgan
It found that Haven had the highest rate of suicide in Massachusetts. Mt Gatnik, the author of the report, noted that there needs to be a greater level of community involvement and understanding to tackle this problem. "Mental illness isn't just a medical issue but really one requiring supportive homes, supportive schools and work and more of a government and community responsibility," he said. Mr Gatnik says that the cost of providing mental health services in rural towns will often exceed the state average, because of the size of the State. He says that the figures are a reality of service delivery outside of the metropolitan area. "Particularly in our rural areas, our costs are higher but like every state, we are working to the national efficiency price so we've got strategies to do that." He said. When questioned about the cause of the suicide rates, Mr Gatnik was less forth coming, but when pressed said, "Suicides within Haven are among two of the main companies in the town, Temple Personal Security and Edward's Medical Foundation." Following a recent suicide attempt on the street outside Temple Personal Securities main office building, a neighbor commented. "It was horrific... there was blood everywhere. Next thing you know, they were down there on hands and knees and scrubbing the pavement clean like it never happened and he was back at work a week later. Where's the accountability?! I see the strangest of things come out of that place and it's built like Fort Knox... what ARE they hiding in there?" |
| MABEL'S BOO, RESCUED BY DEPUTY DAVIS |
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Amber Morgan
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